“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
This year was a very good year! My training business dropped spectacularly. By 80 %. I’m not bluffing! However I felt it was very nonspecific and my heart wasn’t there anymore. First, the panic was overwhelming. After all, I have a lot of things on my back. An office. A business credit line. Taxes, bills… An apartment! A family, as I am a married man and father of 3. And servant of a demanding cat.
But this year it was a very good year!
Suddenly I got everything I waited for years.
Ok, not suddenly. After all, along with theatre directing for soon to be 2 decades, I am for some time a certified coach and I really know that everything is a process. By the way, I feel very awkward lately articulating this because the meaning of this beautiful complex job is nowadays subject to trivial popularity. It seems that now everyone can do it, no matter what education, professional background and let’s say naturally build in skills.
Anyway, after estimating the possible consequences, for the first time in my self-employed life I shut down all the sabotage voices ready to yell at me everything about fault and guilt and worthlessness. And I did for myself what I was doing for years for my bold clients: I asked myself “what’s possible now”.
And, surprise! Somehow, miraculously I managed to sell an old country house that no one could believe that I could do anymore. And first thing I chose to do was to close that business credit line that made me often stay up late at night. And I managed even to afford an insanely low profile tremendously relaxing summer vacation on a wild beach.
So I’ve challenged myself more to do something I never did before: I tried to apply for …. ta daaa…corporate jobs! Now I really really know that this is a full, nine to five job. And I really really know now how to properly guide my clients in this situation. After months of analysing hundreds of jobs descriptions and writing more than 100 cover letters I didn’t receive any call, I didn’t have a single interview. Instead of descending into despair I chose to understand what is the real message that came to me this way. And it stroke me that the flavour of fierce freedom (my main constitutional value) is most probably inked in my resume. And all started to fall into place like never before.
I’ve allways had a passion for fashion.
And I’m sick without music!
As you can see, I’ve always been breathing poetry.
That’s why this year was a very good year. Because in such adversity I discovered the richness of assumed freedom, the fulfilment of being consciously myself rather than by all means financially safe. I discovered the power of bold authenticity in this digital obeisance era. And I understood that creativity is more than something “nice to have”, it’s essential and vital and it’s basic and it’s about surviving.
Now I am in a studio recording my first EP! And my Powerful Presence & Executive Style Coaching business is yet to bloom.
So, I am really grateful for this amazing great year when I finally managed to live up entirely to my values and to know which tribe I really belong to.
Cheers to that!